Past Experiences

As a child we believe that being a grown up is going to be the best thing in the world; no school, no parents telling us what to do and we can go out and stay out as late as we want. When we reach adulthood we realise how hard it is and instantly want to go back to our childhoods where life was so much simpler and, in a sense, parents telling us what to do made us freer. The beauty of childhood is the innocence that comes with it and, even though in some cases this is snatched away at a very young age, children always look for the best in situations and in an instant can go from sad to happy once a new toy, game or tv programme is introduced. As adults, this amazing feature in us all dwindles, responsibility grows, worry and stress take over and bad life experiences start to define and impact us as if they have become ingrained in us.

My life recently has taken a turn for the better, things have started to fall into place and I am now in a relationship with a lovely, caring guy who really makes me happy (just don't tell him because he will use it against me!) Due to past experiences, I feel I am in danger of completely messing this up and, even though it is very easy to say that not everyone is the same, it's much harder to disassociate yourself from the feeling that everyone is and therefore, I always like to prepare myself for the worst. My last relationship left me broken and I have had to rebuild myself back up and now, with this new relationship, there is potential for it to happen all over again which leaves me stupidly worrying over every little thing. My rational side, luckily I have one otherwise I would most definitely have been committed by now, knows that this cannot carry on if I am going to be happy.

I need to go back to the age of innocence and, with this brand new situation, just be positive and let go of the unnecessary stress and worries. It is a big step, but taking the childhood approach and not letting bad situations become ingrained and defining my future is the only way I will be happy. I can't and don't want to mess this up on the basis of my past life because it is just that, a past experience. Time for us all to remember that not all experiences are the same, its time for us to choose the ones that define us, the ones that have the potential to make us happy and, does he make me happy? Abso-fucking-lutely :)

Career

The thing that annoys me about having to look at a different career path is that experience is everything. Everyone requires that you have experience before you even place your cv with them, but the question is how are you meant to get the experience if all companies want experienced people?!

Growing up, this is the part of the career picking process that people neglect to tell you about. It is all well and good deciding that you want to be a teacher or an actress or a lawyer but, when it actually comes down to it and your chosen path doesn't work out for you, it is extremely difficult to try and choose another career due to the E word. The plan is sugar-coated for you when you're in school, you're made to think that it will all be so easy for you and it isn't until you leave that the rose tinted glasses are removed and you're faced with the bleak reality that you have to fight to get where you want to be. We shouldn't be made to think that university is the answer to everything as, once you have obtained a degree, jobs just fall into your lap as this is most certainly not the case.

I know that constant struggle with decisions is part of growing up but having to decide when you're 16 what you want to do until you're 65 is too much to ask. When you have decided and know that this particular job is what you want to do for the rest of your working life, you are thrown into turmoil again when it doesn't work out and you have to alter your plan. All those years of thinking and planning go up in smoke and you're at square one again... However, this time, you don't have 5/6 years to plan where you want to be in 10 years time, you have months, maybe a year to think and decide what you want to do if you want a decent career.

I did a degree that I really enjoyed, English Literature, and I did well. However, I have been out of university 2 years this year and I am working in a lingerie shop which I certainly do not need a degree to do. My plan was to become a teacher but after 3 years of treading on this career path and getting nowhere, I am thinking it is not meant to be. Therefore, after meticulous planning over the space of 4 years, I now have to rethink everything. I want to do something new, exciting and with a prospect of a long career, however, there is a problem with this new plan, the E word! I have only worked in the retail, education and customer service sectors, all of which will be no good for my new career path (well it's a partial plan... Pieces are still falling into place) as, in the business world, this type of experience is no good.

The easiest answer to this rant is to get the experience I need to get me on my way, but how can you do that when no one will give you a chance to shine?

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